Life´s history · Uncategorized

The healing process of a traumatic religious experience!(part 2)

People can only give what they received”

Hey guys!

In this post I want to share more about my healing process from traumatic religious experiences, that I had been through while I was discovering my new identity as a (beloved) daughter of God!

I am not sharing this because I want to blame people or the church for my wounds, but I want you to understand that along the way, even when we are walking with Jesus for a new beginning, we can be hurted by people, by His own people, but this is not the end of the road.

There is always healing available to all of us! God will never see us like most of people do! That is a hopeful truth!

I could finally understand, after painful months of healing that, those experiences was not meant to destroy me, but to make me stronger and more confident about who I was on God’s sight.

I already shared here a little bit about my “first calling” and how I lived very intense experiences in that season, good and bad.

I want to start this story saying that I had, at the beginning of my journey, a lot of misconceptions about God and what it means to be a christian, also about what is christianity lifestyle and comunity.

When I was living in the middle of this comunity and learning about who I was and about God’s character, I did not realize that, a lot of my background was influencing how I would see things and how I would behave.

What ,I think, most people don’t realize is that our worldview is (deeply) influenced by all our childhood and family experiences and also by our traumas and wounds.

So, when I had to face the world and my whole life in a different perspective, it was hard and hurted me! And took time to me to deconstruct a mindset to build another one! That said, I had also to be honest about this: The church, as a comunity, most of the time, is not ready to deal with it!

They don’t realize that people carry this painful background and it will take time to most of us, internalize the truth of the Gospel and live accoding to it! It is not a day overnight process.

When people are not prepared to accept that, mainly the leaders, people will get hurt!

I don’t want to be unfair here, I know that people tried to be patient and inderstanding to me, at least at the beginning! But the truth is, that at some point, people get tired to try and just gave up on you.

Based on my own experiences I can tell : Along all that process, people sometimes will judge your motivations, point your mistakes and will demand things from you that you are not ready to give. And that is crushing!

What I want to point here is that: If God is so kind and patient to us, we also as His church and the Body of Christ, must to be kind and patient with the people who are beginning their walk with Jesus. Otherwise, people will just get hurted and gave it up in the niddle of the way!

I spent a lot of time trying to understand why I had to face all those painful experiences. I know now that it was part of my “training”, part of my maturity process! But to be honest, it doesn’t have to be so traumatic to everyone!

If the sons and daughters of God realize that their purpose is more than just present Jesus to the world, but actually live by His model I am sure that we will change the idea the world has about christians!

We will be seen and recognized by a people who loves with no limits and help to others get healed instead of as hypocrites who judge and hurts people all the time!

It is time for the church to wake up and fill the gaps!

Our calling is to raise up as embassors of God, sons and daughters who represents His love, truth and compassion, cause people are lost and broken out there and really need it!

If you were, like me, hurted by people along the way, I just want to encourage you to have hope again!

God has never planned to hurt you or disappointed you. Sometimes He allows it happen to us just to show us that our hope must be in Him and only Him, we are not here to put all our trust and hope on people, cause we humans are flawed!

You can and should allow yourself to trust and love again but be aware that the only One who can never let you down is the One who loved you since the beginning of times and planned you to have the fulness of life!

“Jesus returned to the Mount of Olives, but early the next morning he was back again at the Temple. A crowd soon gathered, and he sat down and taught them. As he was speaking, the teachers of religious law and the Pharisees brought a woman who had been caught in the act of adultery. They put her in front of the crowd.

“Teacher,” they said to Jesus, “this woman was caught in the act of adultery. The law of Moses says to stone her. What do you say?”

They were trying to trap him into saying something they could use against him, but Jesus stooped down and wrote in the dust with his finger. They kept demanding an answer, so he stood up again and said, “All right, but let the one who has never sinned throw the first stone!” Then he stooped down again and wrote in the dust.

9 When the accusers heard this, they slipped away one by one, beginning with the oldest, until only Jesus was left in the middle of the crowd with the woman. 10 Then Jesus stood up again and said to the woman, “Where are your accusers? Didn’t even one of them condemn you?

11 “No, Lord,” she said.

And Jesus said, “Neither do I. Go and sin no more.” John 8:1-11

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As pessoas só podem dar aquilo que receberam.

Ei pessoal!

Neste post, quero compartilhar mais sobre o meu processo de cura a partir de experiências religiosas traumáticas, pelas quais passei enquanto descobria minha nova identidade como uma filha(amada) de Deus!

Não estou compartilhando isso porque quero culpar as pessoas ou a igreja por minhas feridas, mas quero que você entenda que, ao longo do caminho, mesmo quando estamos caminhando com Jesus para um novo começo, podemos ser feridos pelas pessoas, por Seus próprio povo, mas este não é o fim da jornada.

Sempre há cura disponível para todos nós! Deus nunca nos verá como a maioria das pessoas! Essa é uma verdade esperançosa!

Finalmente pude entender, após meses dolorosos de cura, que essas experiências não foram feitas para me destruir, mas para me tornar mais forte e mais confiante sobre quem eu era aos olhos Dele.

Eu já compartilhei aqui um pouco sobre o meu “primeiro chamado” e como vivi experiências muito intensas naquela temporada, boas e ruins.

Quero começar esta história dizendo que eu tinha, no início de minha jornada, muitos conceitos errados sobre Deus e o que significa ser cristão, também sobre o que é estilo de vida e comunidade no cristianismo.

Quando eu estava morando no meio dessa comunidade e aprendendo sobre quem eu era e sobre o caráter de Deus , eu não entendia que grande parte da minha formação estava influenciando como eu via as coisas e como me comportava.

O que eu acho que a maioria das pessoas não percebe é que nossa visão de mundo é (muito)influenciada por todas as nossas experiências de infância e família e também por nossos traumas e feridas.

Então, quando eu tive que enfrentar o mundo e toda a minha vida através de uma perspectiva diferente, foi difícil e me machucou! E levou um tempo para eu desconstruir uma mentalidade para construir outra!

Dito isto, eu também tenho que ser honesta sobre uma coisa: a igreja, como comunidade, na maioria das vezes, não está pronta para lidar com isso!

Eles não percebem que as pessoas carregam esse pano de fundo doloroso e levará tempo para a maioria de nós, internalizar a verdade do Evangelho e viver de acordo com ele!

Quando a igreja não estão preparadas para aceitar isso, principalmente os líderes, as pessoas se machucam!

Não quero ser injusta aqui, sei que as pessoas tentaram ser pacientes e compreensivas comigo, pelo menos no começo! Mas a verdade é que, em algum momento, as pessoas se cansam de tentar e desistem de você.

Com base em minhas próprias experiências, eu posso dizer: Ao longo de todo esse processo, as pessoas às vezes vão julgar suas motivações, apontar seus erros e exigir de você coisas que você não está pronto para dar. E isso é esmagador!

O que quero destacar aqui é o seguinte: Se Deus é tão gentil e paciente conosco, também nós, como Sua igreja e Corpo de Cristo, devemos ser gentis e pacientes com as pessoas que estão começando a sua caminhada com Jesus. Caso contrário, as pessoas se machucarão e desistirão no meio do caminho!

Passei muito tempo tentando entender por que tinha que enfrentar tudo isso. Agora eu sei que fazia parte do meu “treinamento”, parte do meu processo de maturidade! Mas, para ser sincera, isso não precisa ser tão traumático para todo mundo!

Se os filhos e filhas de Deus perceberem que o objetivo deles é mais do que apenas apresentar Jesus ao mundo, mas viver de acordo com Seu modelo, tenho certeza de que mudaremos a idéia que o mundo tem dos cristãos!

Estaremos sendo vistos e reconhecidos por um povo que ama sem limites e ajuda os outros a serem curados, ao invés de de hipócritas que julgam e magoam as pessoas o tempo todo!

Está na hora da igreja acordar e preencher as lacunas!

Nosso chamado é levantar-se como embaixadores de Deus, filhos e filhas que representam Seu amor, verdade e compaixão, porque as pessoas estão perdidas e quebradas por aí e realmente precisam disso!

Se você foi, como eu, ferido por pessoas ao longo do caminho, eu só quero encorajá-lo a ter esperança novamente!

Deus nunca planejou machucá-lo ou decepcioná-lo. Às vezes, Ele permite que isso aconteça conosco apenas para nos mostrar que nossa esperança deve estar Nele e somente Nele, não estamos aqui para depositar toda nossa confiança e esperança nas pessoas, porque nós, humanos, somos falhos!

Você pode e deve se permitir confiar e amar novamente, mas esteja ciente de que o único que nunca pode decepcioná-lo é aquele que o amou desde o início dos tempos e planejou que você tivesse a plenitude de vida!

Jesus, porém, foi para o monte das Oliveiras.
Ao amanhecer ele apareceu novamente no templo, onde todo o povo se reuniu ao seu redor, e ele se assentou para ensiná-lo.
Os mestres da lei e os fariseus trouxeram-lhe uma mulher surpreendida em adultério. Fizeram-na ficar em pé diante de todos
e disseram a Jesus: “Mestre, esta mulher foi surpreendida em ato de adultério.
Na Lei, Moisés nos ordena apedrejar tais mulheres. E o senhor, que diz? “
Eles estavam usando essa pergunta como armadilha, a fim de terem uma base para acusá-lo. Mas Jesus inclinou-se e começou a escrever no chão com o dedo.
Visto que continuavam a interrogá-lo, ele se levantou e lhes disse: “Se algum de vocês estiver sem pecado, seja o primeiro a atirar pedra nela”.
Inclinou-se novamente e continuou escrevendo no chão.
Os que o ouviram foram saindo, um de cada vez, começando com os mais velhos. Jesus ficou só, com a mulher em pé diante dele.
Então Jesus pôs-se de pé e perguntou-lhe: “Mulher, onde estão eles? Ninguém a condenou? “
“Ninguém, Senhor”, disse ela. Declarou Jesus: “Eu também não a condeno. Agora vá e abandone sua vida de pecado”.
João 8:1-11

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Life´s history · Reflections · Uncategorized

The healing process from a traumatic religious experience!

 Woe to you, teachers of the law and Pharisees, you hypocrites! You shut the door of the kingdom of heaven in people’s faces. You yourselves do not enter, nor will you let those enter who are trying to.” Mathew 23:13

Hello everyone!

A few days ago I watched a video on youtube that makes want to write about healing from traumatic religiosity, cause I went through this process!

A woman was talking about her own experiences with an evangelical cult called “The assembly” and she shared a little about how after the Jesus Moviment,that happened in the 70’s, her family joined this cult and her life became miserable!

I could totally relate with her frustration and experiences with that lifestyle of freedom privation, but mine was not in a cult, was a christian church!

She talked about all the things that was forbidden to her and how she finally “got free” when she started to attend college, discovering that women can be powerful and do whatever they want to do!

I don’t know anything about that woman’s life but what I know is that: You can have all the power, money and indepence of this world and still feel empty. And that’s why I decided to write about it.

That’s right there, where my experience and hers got really different!

When I decided to leave my religious life during my youth, I was also tired of that life where I could not experience any fun or liberty!

I grew up hearing about sin and hell and how I should be a “good person” and follow all the (boring) rules to go to heaven! I got tired of it and just let it go from my life.

But when I was out there living like I wanted, experience a lifestyle with no rules, using drugs, getting wild and living by my own patterns , I had to face, after a while, that in the end of the day I was alone and more than that, there was no purpose in all of it.

I am not gonna lie: sex, drugs and rock n’ roll can be really fun and pleasing for a while, but this feeling does not last forever!

What I found out walking around this scene,including the feminist moviment, is that most of people are just playing a character and running away from their own ghosts, cause that is easier than face the truth!

The truth is that most of us are broken, traumatized and lonely, looking for people who really care about us, looking for a meaning to life, a reason to wake up every morning!

I don’t know what kind of trauma you went through or the hard situations you are facing right now regarding religiosity, but I want to tell you: Jesus is so much more than sundays school and rules that makes you feel like you don’t belong anywhere!

When I finally decided to surrender, after I had tried all the ways possible to fell alive, I made a simple request to God, I said: “God if you are real, if you really see me here, please do something to change my life! I can’t do this anymore”

It’s that simple! You don’t need a church, a pastor or any person to lead you to the truth, you just need to open your heart and be honest to God! He will do the rest.

After I made this choice, everything started to change in my life! All the burden, the pain and the meaningless in my life started to fade away day after day.

So, I just want to be honest with you: You don’t need to blame Jesus for what people or the “church” done to you!

He loves you and He died for you! All He wants is a invitation to your heart and then, all can be different in your life!

Give Him a chance to show you who He really are! A loyal friend, a savior and a loving God.

Despite of what people might say, only Him can reveal to you who you really are!

You are made for a bigger purpose than fame or professional success, you are made to be the image of God and part of His family!

I hope my experineces help you to understand that no matter what happens in your life, God still loves you and wants to have a close relationship with you, free from religiosity!

The next post I will go deeper into my (bad) experiences with church, leaders and about my healing journey!

Have a good week friends! God bless you.